Half-Time Quckie
Muther fuck this fucking fuck shit cock sucker muther fucker!
posted by Jimmy Tressel at 7:18 PM
I'm not all football. I got things to say. I write poetry about things, alot of things that aren't about football. This site is about those things.
posted by Jimmy Tressel at 7:18 PM
125 Comments:
Its ok coach, I still love you.
I have the return of Jim Solomon at 5:30pm on Tuesday, January 9 in the when-will-Jim-Solomon-return?-pool.
Well, that was nifty.
Looks like the Michigan re-matchup WAS something you really should have hoped for.
Gotta tell da guv ta let Mo go.
He still got sum eligability no?
Mo wouldn't a let our team act like that. Yeah, I still luv my guys but what the hell was that?
man i knew that all those hookers last night were a bad idea especially the bulemic one that cake came out of, isn't that the opposite of what was supposed to happen? well we all bet against ourselves and we are all millionaires now but i'll never do that much blow again beore a game. i thought i high fived jc at halftime...
fuck fuck fuck fuck
fuckers
That was fuckin lame coach. Maybe we can make Saban an offer.
Fuck you tressel. I hope you die. What the fuck was that? Bring back John Copper!
How does your ass feel this morning?
I got Jim Solomon at 9pm eastern in the pool.
I took Solomon at 7pm eastern in the pool.
I got ten minutes left.
Solomon at 8:30 is my call.
What the fuck?! Jesus!
Jim Solomon at 8pm Pacific time on Tuesday, January 9.
That's my best bet.
Don't you want me baby. Don't you want me ohh ohh ohh ohh.
I have returneth.
I was right! Ohio State got their asses kicked up and down the field.
Hey Tressel- Ha Ha Ha, loser!
You looked like a fucking geek in your silly little red sweater vest with your stupid little white shirt underneath.
Michigan lost their game because it was a let-down to play in the Rose Bowl. Michigan was pissed about that and didn't really try to win the game. Also, it hurt that USC was basically at home. If that game was played near Ann Arbor Michigan would have won.
Finally, if Michigan won they would now be sharing the national title with Florida. So I was right about that.
I'm laughing all the way to sleep tonight and thinking about all you assholes.
You've won this round, Solomon.
Well, not you, exactly. Florida did the actual winning. You're just doing the shit-talking in spite of the fact that both our teams lost. But I'll let you have it. Far be it from me to take away your moment in the sun.
As for me, I'm sitting poolside at the Hotel Mondrian in Scottsdale, drinking Mezcal sunrises while utilizing the complementary hotel Wi-Fi and getting my hog fluffed by a pair of silicon-enhanced co-eds hailing from USC.
They send their regards.
They also told me to tell you they're sorry about what happened between them and Sean Henne in Cabana 7. They said it happens to every man once in a while, and offered to give him his money back.
Better luck next year to Tress and the Bucks. As well as to Lllloyd and whatever team he happens to be coaching next year.
Until then, I remain,
O.G. Bucknut
(And a loyal member of Tresselnation)
Jim Solomon is stupid.
dude ohio state sucks ass, they werent worth half a shit vs a team from down here in the FLA. Michigan is also shitty, the championship should have been UF vs USC, Boise, or LSU... they were the 4 best teams this year... michigan, ohio state, and wisconsin all suck, cuz theyre from the terrible big-10, thats why yankees suck at football, GO FLORIDA!!!
Hey anonymous,
Don't look now, but I think your swamp boat is leaking.
anyonmous- go fuck yourself
sericerley,
Julius
we still love you coach, i hope you still got to party it up. can't win em' all.
actually im a FSU fan but im just glad a team from florida won it, and yet i know that even FSU did better against florida than ohio state did, so maybe that means fsu > ohio state? or at the very least FSU > michigan... neway its not really important, just know that big-10 sports are overrated and under skilled, because the best 2 teams in the big-10 got out played, out coached, and just straight owned
even more fsuness
FSU did better vs florida than ohio state did, and ohio state beat michigan, and michigan got their asses beat by USC, who lost to UCLA... WHO GUESS WHAT? LOST TO FSU BABY!!! so that means that definetly FLORIDA > FSU > everybody else
ohio state does suck dick. what a disgusting performance. has anyone started a firetressel.com website?
Re: Anonymous
Oh my god, you retarded hillbilly. The Noles lost to Boston College, who slipped past Navy by one point. Following your logic, you'd have lost to a service academy. Now go back to your swamp.
Re: Peter
Yeah, let's fire Tressel. He's only 62-14 at Ohio State. And five of those losses were suffered by a team that John Cooper recruited. See you somewhere in the BCS next year, sucker.
RE: mason dixon
Up yours, asshole.
Penn State will kick Ohio State's ass next year. We'll be making Tressel run to the shitter during the game in '07! We are Penn State, bitch!
I'm getting crazy off that liquor. No telling what I might write later on.
Watch out, you crazy nutsackin bastards.
fuck you, Tressl
you asshole
can't you fucking coach right? you shithead
I bet 100$ on your shit team winning
last time I put my faith in a douche bag like you
fuck off, tressler
i hope you swallow on yopur own cum you punk bitch
stop messing around with prostitutes and video games and start winning football games, you prick
lick my balls, tressel.
I hate you now. urban Meyer is hotter, anyways.
So it is so!
Frank is gay. There's no question now.
Look at that post. It was written late at night. I guess he was drunk.
I can't wait till he posts sober and tries to explain this one.
Hey, Frank- did you ever complete that Tressel video with the C&C Music Factory and Madonna songs?
im here to flame some more northern pussys.
when are you bitches gonna give up at football, and just stick to hockey or whatever retarded sport you play up there.
leave the football to florida, cuz u guys are obviously too shitty to beat anyone with quality
FSU will finish higher than ohio state next year.
mark it down pussys
re: anonymous
Get lost, asshole.
re: bill
I am not gay. You are the one who probably wants to have sexual relations with Tressel.
O.G. Bucknut , Jim Solomon, or Frank?
I wonder who would win in a fight.
They all seem to be very angry young men.
I don't know where I'm going with this. It's just something that I thought about while reading the posts on this website today at work.
Maybe we can stage a brawl and Coach Jim Tressel can tape it and post it on YouTube?
I was laughing out loud at work today while reading the most recent Q&A thread. I want to get involved in the next one.
Dear Coach Tressel,
I think it would be nice if you made a wrap-up of 2006 post.
You could post the top ten best threads and top ten best posts by your readers.
Also you could list the top ten moments of the Ohio State football season.
Thank you for taking the time to consider this and for giving me the opportunity to post my comments here.
I left a stinky in the break room at lunch today. The other people eating lunch blamed each other!!!!!
It was fucking awesome!!!!!!!
re: the first post on this comment by anonymous
A homo, are ya?
Fuck this shit. This site fuckin' blows dick now. Tressel doesn't even fuckin' post no more. He is too stupid and embarrassed to post. Fuck his ass.
I am done with this shit site.
Word up.
Man that Title game hurt, but ohh well, we lost our entire defense before the season. Next year will be a down year, then we will win the National Title in 2008.
All you Tressel haters, you cqan all go suck a cock...Tressel rules.
To all you Southerners: The Civil War is over, and last I checked, the South is full of uneducated hill-billy nitwits. Florida played well but it took an Ohio coach to tame you wild animals.
Our line couldn't block the Florida apes coming off the edge, I bet we would have won if we would have run the ball up the gut more.
We'll be back,
Go Bucks!
And Solomon, USC raped Michigan and Ohio State finished higher than Michigan in every poll.
Mike Hart is a bitch, Henne is a whigger, and Llllloyd Carr sucks Jalen Rose's dick.
too bad for the buckeyes. tressel can now go back to making money in one of his schemes
Right Bobby, when the DE's are comin with their ears pinned back, you run the ball up the gut till they stay home. Basic coaching Tressel. 2 million a year.
ashole... you fucked up and broke hearts, but that doesn't mean you can't post jerk.
I have a question for uou guys...I was thinking about going to Daytona for the 500...Have you ever been?
I heard its a big white trash fuck fest...What do you think?
re: anonymous
Take it back. Tressel didn't mean to lose.
He doesn't curse you out at your job.
re: Bobby Digital
Yes, there is a lot of smelly, white people there. If you are white like me but don't like to smell other men, stay away from it. If you are non-white, stay away, cause you'll be subjected to racial taunts.
I say to watch it on the tv, if you like that sort of crap. I don't like Nascar because it is stupid.
I be lickin this site.
It is something to tide over the time in the joint.
Oh no, looks like we have a new black guy on board.
the daytona 500 is a big awesome trailer park orgy... its the bomb...
oh and about ohio state, they are a bunch of trash yankee pussys who cant run, cant pass, are too small, and just plain blow
your jerzees are shitty
your team is shitty
give up, go play something dumb like volleyball
florida is the best football state in the US... none of you pale yankees got shit on the south
FSU > all
We all have the Civil War on the South.
How's that taste?
...and normal chromosomes and no uncle-daddy-cousin-Jethros (on the south). oh yeah and pale necks that match our pale "Drivin'" arms. fuck your dixie racist flags and grits and lack of proper higher education. you can't get a phd in welding.
Y'all be hatin' on us all day, but we kicked your yankee ass, bitch.
Hello gang,
Just stopped by to say hi.
I got an urge to shit in the afternoon at work today. I decided I would save the shit for home. Here it is three hours later and I am gearing up for a wonderful shit.
This has been in the making for three days now. I just know this is going to be a great shit. I blew a couple farts in my car on the way home from work and let me tell you they were great ones!
They were so good, I guarantee you guys would have liked them. It was a great funk that you would have appreciated. Like fine, aged cheese- a smell that you have to smell and say to yourself, "You know that smells fucked up, but I just want to smell it some more and engulf myself in the aroma."
This shit is going to be big, figuratively and literally. I call these shits mastodon shits. They are brown like wooly mammoths and they are big and they smell like something that has been dead for a million years.
I expect to read a nice magazine in the bathroom. The process will take 30-45 minutes.
When I am done I will go to the liquor store. I will get drunk.
Then I will masturbate.
I will dedicate my shit to Jim Tressel because it appropriately describes the way he coached against Florida- shitty.
I will pour out a little liquor for the niggaz on lockdown like Maurice Clarett and the dead ones, too.
I will dedicate my sperm to the hot chicks in the Tressel photo.
Thanks, all
Oh no. It looks like we have another dumbass Ohio State-hating Jew on the site.
After you get Jim Solomon's phone number get lost, Sullivan. You are a piece of shit. We don't like you.
after all that, I never took a shit last night. Then I in turn decided to not get drunk and not to play with myself. No worries. I have begun drunking right now and will soon poo. THis will be the shiznit.
To Bill,
Fuck you, you silly asshole. Go kill yourself.
I just jerked off during the Super Bowl halftime show!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
See Tressel? That's how you win a title game.
I am getting drunk. Fuck this whining shit.
Coach Tressel,
You should join the NFL and try to win the Super Bowl. Think of all the blowjobs you would get! I know if I was a good college coach like you, I would make that change to the pro game.
This website is the shiznit.
I don't think Tressel is getting any blow jobs from One Tit Mary anymore, what with that awful display in the national championship BCS bowl game.
He doesn't even post here anymore because he is embarrassed. He probably has to eat his wife's pussy as punishment.
re: Bill
I don't swing that way. Tony Sullivan seems like a decent, funny guy, but he's not getting my phone number.
I am very happy sticking my big dick up my girlfriend's pussy and ass 5 nights a week (I do have to have some down time, after all).
re: Tony Dungy!!!
Hah hah hah! Great post, man!
Jim Tressel- Hiya, dude. You got great gams.
Sullivan:
You are a dumb shit ass hole. You should take a long walk off a short pier. Then, you and Jim Solomon can go to temple together.
Seriously though, Senator Tressel, you should post a little more.
The Bears only lost cause that pussy Gator qb they have...He is terrible.
Fuck Tressel, pull your head out of your ass and post something. Are you sulking over your mediocre recruitng class too? Your world used to kick ass, but you haven't posted anything in a month you fucker.
I think The Ohio State University told Jim Tressel to lay off the posting for now.
We got out recruited by Illinois. Your really slipping Tress.
I like balls in my sugar.
The Gators cheated.....they slipped something in Troy Smith's drink before the game and got the O-Line fucked up on weed during the warm-up.........Damn Gators...
By the way..... F Michigan, F Penn State, F Notre Dame, F Texas, F USC, F Boise State, F the whole NCAA division 1........ Bucks rule....only 2 teams can get to the game--one has to lose... got there 2 times in 6 years--- More first round picks than anyone else---Heisman, Tons of All Americans--- Screw off--Bucks rule...we will be back to the title game (and win it) after 2008 season
that's crazy talk
John L. Smith- you are an asshole. Maybe if you weren't such a douchebag and focused more on football than skydiving, you would still be coaching Michigan State. You are a loser.
Fuck off, dickface.
What is a "half-time quckie"?
I think Tressel was possibly drunk during the Florida game.
Maybe he is in rehab now and university officials are keeping it hush hush?
By the way, I shit this morning. Another mastodon shit. I also pulled out some dingleberries while I was wiping. My ass hasn't felt this fresh in years!
Tony Sullivan is a shit maven.
Hear my voice
Feel my noise
I am the dancing queen
I am sick of reading about Frank's gayness.
I am sick of reading about Jim Solomon's massive 4-inch dick.
I am sick of reading about Tony Sullivan's bowel movements.
I am sick of reading the comments made by that pussy-ass Redneck anonymous fucker.
It's Valentine's Day and I've got a date with my toilet bowl, so suck it, Bill.
What is up, people?
It's Friday night. You know what that means. I'm going to SHIT!!!!!!!
I just jerked off to that picture of Jim tressel wearing a thong on his speedboat. That picture is fire!
I am gucking drunj, bitch Tresl
Oh great. Another fuckin' Jew has joined us.
Tony Sullivan- if you must talk about crapping, go right ahead. At least there will be something to read here. I am disappointed that Coach has abandoned us. He is having a terrible 2007 and I am starting to lose faith.
Sunday shit-
On Sunday, 2/18 I took a quality healthy shit in the late morning.
For dinner I had previously frozen shellfish. It really destroyed me. I had a nasty stomach hurtin' and shit attack.
Tressel, you are such a burnout. It all went downhill after the nc game. How do you go to the nc game, and still get outrecruited by illinois. The Bucs are in for a long haul
Tressek,
please post more stuff.
Poetry? Who is talking about poetry? I just want to write a line.
Fuck fuck fuck
We all fuck
Fuck fuck fuck
Up your truck
I made a poodie.
I need more Steven Swain in my life. Jim Tressel has abandoned us. Somebody please get that Swain guy to come back and post again. (The Swain comment three or four posts up is like more than two weeks old already.)
This website is the shit. The only problem I have with it, is the guy doesn't post enough.
Update your blog, nigga.
I'll fuck your wife for you, Tressel.
Sign me up for some truck stop love.
My name is Truck and I love to fuck.
Is this cocksucker coach ever going to post again?
I will masturbate tonight and shoot my goo into the back of a Tonka dump truck. Is that cool or what?
Hey Tressler,
What do you think about the Ohio State Buckeyes basketball team?
Will they go all the way?
Will they get their asses kicked by Florida in the title game?
Please post your thoughts, buddy.
What's up with all the truck shit?
Thad Matta Mattas.
It is now April 1, 2007.
It is safe to assume Jim Tressel is now dead.
Or Ohio State read my letter and made the site guy stop posting. In that case, it would mean my original thinking was correct, that this blog was not written by Jim Tressel but rather a stupid cocksucker student.
Fuck you, bitch.
Signed, sealed, delivered- I'm Yours!
Please vote for me to be the next American Idol.
I heard he was in rehab... fuck you Patrick Harris. I still believe in you J.T. Please come home
Anyone give a damn about this year's spring game? Think the Bucks will show up this time?
Nice try by the B-ballers, cept for the 20 missed threes. We shoulda blew em out, oh well...
I'd fuck Tressel's wife but I don't wanna catch what he's got, think I'll just masterbate to a pic of the Gator cheerleaders!
Old School University, do we play Florida in baseball this year? Probably in the finals of the college world series... Woulda won if we coulda just caught the fly balls! Speakin a fly balls, mines gotta answer the phone, Tres is callin again to whine some more.
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re: Celia
Shut the fuck up, bitch.
re: Patrick Harris
We always knew you were gay.
I ain't drinkin Gatorade no more.
Hey cant you all read. He said Muther fuck this fucking shit cock sucker muther fuckers. He isnt coming back
Hey asshole,
Coach Tressel was talking about his team getting its ass beat in the first half of the championship game, you retard.
Now he is embarrassed and hid his pussy head in the ground.
Fuck you, Tressel.
It's April 23. You've been hiding long enough, pussy.
ouch! I'm hurt! I've been called an asshole yet again in my life. your a smart one arent you. you fucking infected vagina lesion. your name is man with an underwear hat and you are call me a retard. Just because you saw me walk by and take your drool bowl doesnt mean that I'm in your spec. ed. classes. okay there skippy. you suck so does your mom but not as good. GO BUCKS! Senator Tressel is to busy coming up with a new campaign for the season. buckeye in irish country
At least I set you straight.
C'mon coach... you've been drowning your sorrows in skanky ho's and coke long enough. Get back on the blog!!!!!
Coach, I hope you overcome your addiction soon and post again.
I promise I'll slob on your knob if you post again.
Your girl,
Britney
Hey Coach,
I've almost cleared up that nasty case of gonorrhea you gave me. To celebrate I stuffed my ass w/coke so you can snort it out before taking a trip up the ol' Hershey highway.
If you post again, I promise to keep taking the penicillin...
Your fan,
Lindsay
Please come back and delight us, Coach.
Mr. Tressell,
I also want you to come back and post here again. Also, I was the one who left the poo poo undies on your kitchen table. Ha ha, asshole.
And thats the truth. All I need is you.
Hey Frank,
What did I tell you about acting like a sissy girly man here? leave before I put a foot up ya ass.
This blog deserves for me to wipe my ass on it.
I made a little pood a poo tonight on my bathroom floor while drunk. Cool or what?
It is now May 16...
re: Steve Swain doo doo.
Definitely cool.
Now May 21.
Motherfucker's dead. Typical Buckeye, can't hang.
Homo.
fuck you, Mr. Ttressel is my father and just wants a little piece of my sweatry dick
To the skid mark kid,
If he wants a piece of your dick, why not just give it to him? I know I'd sure like to get my dick sucked by your father.
Today's date is March 27, 2008. Where is Jim Tressel?
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