Monday, September 12, 2005

The Five People You Meet in Mitch Albom's Vagina

Rough weekend. Yeah, so I was little stressed out yesterday, so I decided to take a nice hot relaxing bath. I'll tell ya what, I got this new soap from Bath and Body Works, and it was so nice and relaxing. Cucumber Melon with Exfolating beads. Heavenly. It's like taking a nap in a field full of dasies after smoking a big fatty and popping one off into an old gym sock. So there I was soaking in the tub, mellowing out, I got my duckies, I got my new soap, I'm flipping through the channels, looking for a good Titty Movie on the flat screen, trying to forget what a shitty Saturday I had, but then what do I land on but the Sunday Sports Reporters.

First thing I want to say is FUCK YOU, Mitch Albom! I'll start however many quarterbacks I feel like starting. Maybe next week I'll line up under center? Maybe I'll go dig up your buddy Morrie and start him. I'd start you, but you probably throw like girl, you blowcomb haired mama's boy. How do you like that? My wife made me read, The Five People You Meet in Heaven, and Frankly, it was the gayest book I ever read. Hey I got a better title for bout The Five People You Meet in the Woods Behind a Restop at 3 am? If I want football Advice I'll ask someone who knows what he's talking about, If I want to read something that induces meunstral bleeding I'll call you.


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